Be Not Afraid

Carry You (A Song for My Amazing Mom)

Happy Mother’s Day!

My mom is incredible, and as a new mom this year, I am especially grateful for the beautiful example of selfless love she has given me.  All of my life she has made me feel deeply loved, and supported me through everything.  Since being diagnosed with cancer, I have been even more carried by her love.

Because John Paul can’t come to my many doctor’s appointments (even when I’m not getting chemo it isn’t safe for him), and Mike needs to work during the day, it would be impossible for us to do all we need to do without the help of a third person.  When we first realized this, I was scared and stressed.  But, without even being asked, my mom chose to leave behind her life in Wisconsin to come live with us.  Every night she gets up with John Paul around 4 am to feed him.  When I’m getting my chemo or going to the doctor she drives 25 minutes each way with me on a busy highway, then stays in the car and cares for John Paul while I go inside.  She makes Mike and me wonderful dinners, helps with laundry, and cleans our house.  And she does all this while loving us, unconditionally.  I don’t know what we would do without her help and wonderful, positive, presence, and am so grateful for her sacrifice.

Mike’s mother, Margie, has also been an amazing support for us.  She has sent meals, helped us move, and even threw me a beautiful baby shower in the hospital!  So that my mom could go home to spend some time with my dad and grandmother, Margie spent last week with us, caring for John Paul and Mike and me.  I am so grateful for the time she sacrificed at school (she is a wonderful teacher) and for how lovingly she cared for all of us.  Thank you so much for everything you do Margie, and Happy Mother’s Day!

Mom, I love you so much, and am so grateful for all you do for me!  Happy Mother’s Day!

Click below to hear a song I wrote for my mom, and Happy Mother’s Day to all of the amazing moms reading this!

Carry You

Wherever I go, you’re still with me
‘Cause who I am was made from you
Your love has always shaped meFor I was knit within your womb
And I was always meant for you
You carried me, so lovingly
So wherever I go, I’ll carry you

When I’m on my own, apart from you
I try to love as you have done,
Giving all I have freely

For I was knit within your womb
And I was always meant for you
You carried me, so lovingly
So wherever I go, I’ll carry you

Love protects us, and keeps us safe
Love rejoices in us
Love lifts us when we are down
Love we share never fails

For I was knit within your womb
And I was always meant for you
You carried me, so lovingly
So wherever I go, I’ll carry you

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15 comments

  1. Robyn OBrien

    Hi Allison. I heard your story on Monday last week when your Mom was at Dr. Huff’s office (I am her Dental Hygienist). She suggested that I take a look at your blog. I haven’t read all your posts (yet) but I am so moved by your faith and courage. The song you wrote as a tribute to her was so beautiful it brought tears to my eyes…
    If Sherry is there please give her a hug for me. I hope you both have a wonderful Mother’s Day. As I told your mom I will keep all 4 generations of your family in my thoughts and prayers.
    God Bless. Robyn

  2. sylvia krause

    Dear Allison,
    You are also an amazing new mother. What a wonderful gift you have in writing this song. You are in my prayers.
    Mother’s tennis friend

  3. Betsy Anderson

    This song is lovely. I am listening to it for the second time. My girls just left and after spending a wonderful weekend with them, I was a little weepy to see them go. This song helped me know, they are always with me. (of course Laura does live in town, lol)

    Keep the blogs and songs coming Ali, you are so gifted!!!!

    May God continue to bless you and heal you.
    Betsy

    • Betsy, thank you for always checking up on me and commenting! I’m so glad you enjoyed the song!! And I’m so glad you had a wonderful mother’s day weekend.

      Thank you also for encouraging me to share my writing and songs! Almost all of my songs I wrote as prayers, without ever thinking I’d share them with anyone other than Mike. I can’t tell you how much it means to me to know that you are enjoying them too!

  4. Kathy Wilcox

    Ali: Wow, what a wonderful song and gifted song writer you are! Your song you wrote and sang in honor of your wonderful mom is very moving and special! Please know that my thoughts and prayers and love are always with you and your family as you journey down the road of life! You truly are an inspiration to me as I undergo more chemo treatments!

    You are a blessing to the many people who know you!
    REMEMBER:
    “One furnace melts all hearts — LOVE;
    One balm soothes all pain — PATIENCE;
    One medicine cures all ills — TIME; and,
    One light illuminates all darkness — HOPE.”

    Say hi to your mom and dad for me and know that I pray and think of you every day,
    Kathy Wilcox

    • Kathy, thank you for your sweet encouragement! Your positive attitude is an inspiration to me, and I hope you know how often you’re in my thoughts and prayers. I know we’ve only met a few times, but I’ve always felt a special connection to you. I look up to you so much. Thank you for your example of strength and grace.

  5. Jennifer Haluska

    Allison- I used to work with your mother when she was a Speech Pathologist at Bullen. She is a wonderful woman- beautiful inside and out- your song is so beautiful. I am truly inspired by you. You are in my prayers.

  6. Aunt Judy

    I just learned of your blog yesterday, so I got up this morning alone to read it in the quite of the morning. Uncle Sam came down to find me in tears, both happy and sad tears. I believe in you and Mike and I believe the person you will be when this is over will be more amazing than the person you are now! Last week I was looking for Dan’s birth certicate and came across an email I saved from 2002 when one of Matthew’s friends was diagnosed with cancer. His mom commicated through email and sent out this story don’t know it you ever heard it, it’s called,” Just P.U.S.H”.:
    A man was sleeping at night in his cabin when suddenly his room filled with light, and God appeared. The Lord told the man he had work for him to do, and showed
    him a large rock in from of his cabin.
    The Lord explained that the man was to push against the rock with all his might. So, this the man did day after day. For many years he toiled from sun up to sun down; his shoulders set squarely against the cold, massive surface of the unmoving rock, pushing with all his might.
    Each night the man returned to his cabin sore and worn out, feeling that his whole day had been spent in vain.
    Since the man was showing discouragement, the Adversary (Satan) decided to enter the picture by placing thoughts into the weary mind:
    “you have been pushing against that rock for a long time, and it hasn’t moved.” Thus, giving the man the impression that the task was impossible and he was a failure.
    These thoughts discouraged the disheartened man. “Why kill myself over this?” he thought. “I’ll will just put in my time, giving just the minimum effort; and that will be good enough.”
    And that is what he planned to do, until one day he decided to make it a matter of prayer and take his troubled thoughts to the Lord. “Lord,” he said, “I have labored long and hard in your service, putting all my strength to do that which you have asked. Yet, after all this time, I have not even budged that rock by half a millimeter. What is wrong? Why am I failing?”
    The Lord responded compassionately, “My friend, when I asked you to serve Me and you accepted, I told you that your task was to push against the rock with all of your strength, which you have done. Never once did mention to you that I expected you to move it. Your task was to push. And now you come to Me with your strength spent, thinking that you have failed. But is that really so? Look at yourself. Your arms are strong and muscled, your back sinewy and brown, your hands are callused from constant pressure, your legs have become massive and hard. Through opposition, you have grown much, your abilities now surpass that which you used to have. Yet you haven’t moved the rock. But your calling was to be obedient and to push and to exercise your faith and trust in My wisdom. This you have done. Now I, My friend, will move the rock.”
    At times, when we hear a word from God, we tend to use our own intellect to decipher what He wants, when actually what God wants is just simple obedience and faith in Him. By all means, exercise the faith that moves mountains, but know that it is still God who moves mountaines
    When everything seems to go wrong…
    just P.U.S.H.
    When the job gets you down..
    just P.U.S.H.
    When people don’t react the way you think they should..
    just P.U.S.H.
    When people don’t understand you…
    just P.U.S.H.
    P=Pray
    U=Until
    S=Something
    H=Happens

    Matthew and this boy grew apart over the years but I still see him in town and I think, people PUSHED for him and now know that everyone is PUSHing for you!
    Love,
    Aunt Judy

    • Aunt Judy, thank you so much for your beautiful response and for everything you have done for Mike and me during this time. You and Uncle Sam have been so helpful and wonderful and it means the world to us!!

      I love the story you shared!! I so often think that things are in my own hands and that I have to figure out by myself where I’m going and how I’m going to get there-it’s so good to be reminded that following God’s path for us is enough. Thank you for reminding me of this, and reminding me of all the wonderful people praying and pulling for us!! We are so blessed.

  7. Pingback: 31 Days of Facing My Fears: Day 31 Keeping Faith and Hope Alive | Be Not Afraid

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